TV thinking

I'm watching a lot of tv lately (mostly HGTV) since I feel I'm suffering from a permanent flu. When I look at all the people in the shows, my first though is how the're not sick and I am. All these healthy people and I'm sick. It's very hard for me to see myself in my post cancer life --this feels like it'll last forever. Then I think "what if Sarah Richardson suddently had cancer?" I would be thinking "my god, poor her, that's horrible!" Then of course, I think "oh wait, that's me!" What can I do but get through it as best i can, but it's geting harder to stay positive. I'm just sad, I guess.